What the hell is happening to the state of music? At work we now listen to the radio as we work, 5fm if you must you know, and I’m starting to think that I prefer the sounds of silence. Has anyone actually listened to the lyrics that are broadcast? Chris Rock spoke about how girls will listen to anything as long as it has a good beat and now I know it to be true. Allow me to present a few examples:

1. Lily Allen “It’s Not Fair”. I was listening to the lyrics because I enjoy the subtle nuances and wordplay that most artists (that I listen to, at least) employ. This song was…well, I heard something in the song that made me wonder so I typed it into the ol’ Google. Gosh…try Lily Allen Its Not Fair lyrics. Go on.

2. Hoobastank “Inside Of You”. Enough said.

3. Almost any rap song. Or hiphop song. Or R&B for that matter. Anyone listened to “Get Low” by Lil John? Or how many of you “love college”? Right now, girls reading this are getting their Westlife panties in a bunch, “Oh but I love that song!” And some people love child pornography, doesn’t make it right, does it?

Unfortunately, the accompanying videos are even worse. I saw one of the recent Now DVDs. Wow. How the hengis green are they gonna top this? Britney dryhumping guys in various states of undress, Hillary Duff in bondage and of course, the ever-classy Lady Gaga. Has anyone else noticed that she cant’ dance? And trust me, I know what not knowing how to dance looks like. Apparently she used to be a stripper. Even fully nude I doubt it could distract from that giant nose of hers…Anyway, proboscis aside, how can they top these videos? They’re gradually wearing less and less whilst doing outrageous things. Soon, they’ll be fully nude, singing how virginal they are, while riding a purple unicorn and fighting a giant dragon made out of marzipan.

The worst part about all of it is that rock music now seems comparitively tame. There are no real shockers anymore. Popstars behave worse than most rock stars. Where’s Marilyn Manson? Off concentrating on his painting somewhere. I saw the ‘behind the scenes’ footage of the Fall Out Boy DVD…this is a rock band? With it’s roots in hardcore and punk? Good gracious. Even Slash has toned down his drug use, no doubt due to some of the American Idols finalists getting to the dealer ahead of him and buying the lot. And the original shock rocker? Where is he? Falling off karts, doddering around his house in a (not drug-related) daze mumbling and murmering.


*sigh* What happened to popstars singing about rainbows and happiness and leaving the anguish to the pros? I don’t want to see Robbie Williams chuck a TV out of a hotel window, unless said TV takes out the rest of Take That. (C’mon guys, it wasn’t even cool the first time)

And we wonder why school kids are having sex in the bathroom at Cavendish Mall. Apart from the fact that those bathrooms are pretty cool.

And I know a lot of people don’t agree. That’s why this is about MY opinion and not yours. So shut your mouths. The Slipknot/Celine Dion duet is about to begin.


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